


Take My World It is Yours to Command

by Dophne



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: CACW Fix-it, Had to Get it Out of My Head, Happy Ending, Hurt Steve, Hurt Tony, M/M, One-Shot, Steve loves Tony, Steve-centric, Tony loves Steve, real late to the game :)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-25
Updated: 2016-08-25
Packaged: 2018-08-10 23:02:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7864951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dophne/pseuds/Dophne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve realizes how much he screwed up. How much he needs Tony but all he can do is wait for Tony to make the first move.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Take My World It is Yours to Command

**Author's Note:**

> Writers block...can't continue my other fics if I did not get this in words. So I shall post it for you to read. Enjoy it! Please let me know what you think. Unbeta'd

It has been six months, and he still has the same nightmare. It was always the same, waking him up in a cold sweat. No matter how many times he talks to Bucky. No matter how many times he comforts Lang. No matter how many times he calmed Clint. No matter how many times he walks Wanda through her terrors. No matter what he does it never changes. Steve always dreams of killing Tony in Siberia. It did not happen, thank God, but it still gave him the shivers that he could have done it. 

 

Steve was the worst kind of man ever. The look on Tony’s face has etched itself into Steve’s retinas. He has drawn it so many times. All the sketchbooks are filled with the same sketch. He had hoped if he had drawn it enough, he could finally forget it. He wanted to remember the times he held the man in his arms. How his face looked when he pleasured him. How his face lit up when he walked into the lab with a sandwich in hand. All he wanted was Tony, but he could never have him for what he did. 

 

Not for the first time, Steve cried. He cried for what he lost. He cried for what he did. He cried for the person who he had done it too. Steve Rogers was a bad man. At least now he did not have to be Captain America. At least now he does not have to continue to let down the title the country has given him. 

 

Steve woke up again a few hours later from the nightmare. His phone sat on the nightstand next to his bed, but it stayed silent an indication on how Tony felt. Who would want to see the man who put a shield to your chest and left you alone on a mountain? He wouldn’t but a part of him hoped that Tony would call. 

 

* * *

 

Talking to Bucky on the ice was both easier and harder for him. It was easier because he knew Bucky couldn’t answer him but harder because he was talking to a brick wall. Steve talked anyway. He told Bucky how at the end of it, he was no longer looking at Tony but at Red Skull. At the end of the fight, Steve barely regained himself to change the direction of the shield from his head to the arc reactor. Steve could not remember the moment his mind made the switch. Didn’t matter, though, he had lost control and Tony paid the price. 

 

* * *

 

Steve was painting. It was finally something different than the norm but still the same subject. This time, he was painting Tony sleeping on their bed but still had the arc reactor in his chest. Steve loved the glow of it and was sad that Tony had it surgically removed. Still, he painted him wearing his Captain America boxers while cuddling into his Ironman plushie. It was sight he was used to seeing before the whole Serbia incident, even with the added bonus. Steve smiled sadly at the half-finished painting before covering it up from curious eyes. 

 

He walks away thinking about the phone that still dauntingly lays silent. A part of him wanted to pick up the phone and talk to Tony. Tell him about his new painting, even picture it for him, but alas he couldn’t. He sent the phone with the intention of never being the first to call. It was Tony’s choice, not his. 

 

It took eight months to get finally into the headspace where he was finally willing to move on a bit and get over Siberia and the Accords. Steve read them again and could not help editing them on the way as he read. He marked what he liked, what he did not like and even what he would add to make it more agreeable. Though they were just a heap of papers now. But still, he signs them even if he never actually sends in his copy of the Accords. Again, he was no longer Captain America. 

 

* * *

 

It was the one year anniversary of the Siberia incident with Zemo when the phone finally rings. Steve is so eager, scared, happy and worried at the same time as he rushes to answer. He half expected it to be Ross or Rhodes on the other end saying how much of a disgrace to the American name he truly was. But it wasn’t. 

 

It was Tony. 

 

Steve gasped feeling his eyes well up in tears as Tony just said a sleepy ‘hello.' Steve smiled into the phone and asked if he was down at his workshop and if FRIDAY has finally locked him out that he had to call him to complain about it. Tony huffed confirming Steve’s suspicion. It was nice to hear Tony’s voice again. And now at least they were talking, right?

 

Since then all Steve did was talk on the phone. Their calls would last so long it bugged the hell out of his bunk mates telling him to shove off into a secluded area of the building in which they were living. But Steve did not care not in the slightest. He got to talk to Tony. He got to hear his love’s voice even when half the time it was crying at him for being a stupid ass man that he is. 

 

Steve listens to it all because, for Tony, Steve was willing to do it all. 

 

* * *

 

The first time they met in person after Siberia was exactly one year, two months and twenty-eight days. Not that Steve was counting or anything. And Tony looked so beautiful in his tailored suit and custom sunglasses standing with a sign saying ‘Capsicle.' Tony did not touch him. Did not reach for him and Steve was okay with that. He let him have his space. All he cared about was being Tony’s friend now. All he cared about was his happiness. 

 

Tony takes Steve out into the market of a small town in a small unknown country that had not signed the Accords. Tony did not want to come to Wakanda as to not give Ross or the UN any leads on where to find them. If they were spotted in this country at least, they could run for it and start a false rumor to keep them at bay. Tony was so sweet and thoughtful. No one really appreciated him like they should, except for Rhodey and Vision. They did a much better job of it than he did. 

 

After that meeting, they have been seeing each other ever twice a week. It became a ritual everyone on both sides of the team have added to their schedules. Steve would drop anything for Tony he just had to ask, but he knew Tony would never do it. Tony would think he was abusing him when he was far from it. 

 

Though they still had the issue if Tony thought Steve was making a move to touch him, he would distance himself away or flinch a bit. It made Steve hate himself more. If anyone other than him had did what he did they would be dead. Steve made the decision that if Tony ever, and he means ever, wanted to kill Steve, truly kill him, then Steve would lay down and let him have it. His life was no longer his to decide when it should end or continue. 

 

They talked about everything and nothing when they met. Steve established early on that they had to talk about what happened and anything else that needed to be said. Steve had lay bare every secret, sin, and wrongdoing he has ever done or had out to Tony. He gave him everything knowing it will never be enough. At first, Tony would just listen, but as time passed, he began to open up too. Began to give and take in their conversations. Steve could tell they were both ready to move on from Siberia. It took them a bit to do it, but they could finally begin to truly move forward. 

 

* * *

 

It has been two and a half years when Steve and Tony decide to give them a go. To actually have a romantic relationship. They even agreed to couple therapy a few times a month for the first few months to get them settled in. Neither were ready to get physical or take it that far, but they acknowledged that they were both beyond being just friends.

 

Steve and Tony do a lot of things couples do that do not require touching. It has become a sour point for both of them that they have constantly discussed in therapy, but it seems to be coming a long, or at least Steve hopes so. He really wants just to hold Tony in his arms and never let go. 

 

He misses the feel of Tony’s skin on his. 

 

* * *

 

It was a long stressful mission and Tony had gotten hit real good when it happened. Steve had rushed to Tony’s side wearing his new ‘Nomad’ outfit. He did not touch Tony but leaned over him to get a better look at his lover’s condition. Tony released the faceplate and stared back at him. 

They have done a few missions now as Ironman and Nomad getting to be better with working together on the field again. It helped that Steve no longer wore the Captain America outfit or carried around the shield while Tony changed the color of his suit.

 

It has been five years since they have established their relationship and at this point, Steve is screaming to hold Tony, but all he can do is stare into his brown eyes. Tony reaches up to touch Steve’s face, and he melts. Steve grabs Tony and hauls him so close it hurt. Tony disengaged the suite making it fall to pieces at their feet before Tony responded. 

 

Tony hugged him back. It felt so good to have him in his arms. Tony fit perfectly like he was made for him. A part of Steve wondered if Tony was. But at that moment he did not care. All he could think about was Tony in his arms, the feel of Tony’s skin on his, his smell, his breath, his soft hair, his everything. 

 

Tony was wholly his now, and Steve belonged to Tony. Not even another Civil War can tear them apart. They are different people now who still love each other even with all their mistakes. 

 

Tony takes Steve’s hands in his smiling. He says, “Oh captain my captain how thee has enthralled me so.”


End file.
